Parenting is not as easy as a pie. I think it is one of the most complicated issues and responsibility parents have to face. Having three children at the young age is perhaps an advantage for me because I can somehow relate to this modern generation. Teens are quite difficult to handle with all the physical and psychological changes to occur. Luckily, my children do not give me a lot of headaches yet. Of course, they have their mood swings as I have mine and requires a lot of patience in dealing it but we all come to settle our differences at the end of the day. Each of them has distinct characteristics and talents that make them a unique individual. Nevertheless, these aren’t factors for me to say I’m an expert. I have failed many times and still struggling until now however I am learning, though. And I intend to learn more to become a better parent for them.
Parents shouldn’t be too strict and too lenient in disciplining children. I’ve learned it from my parents. I realized that my parents are my yardstick in parenting. My father was a disciplinarian a in diplomatic way but he could also be stern especially if we have done something really bad. My mother, on the other hand, was somewhat more on verbal expression. She could be annoying when her mouth starts to fire up (LOL). But of course, we were scared every time so we didn’t dare cross her path. We were all quiet and just stayed in one corner of our house. Then when Papa arrived from work and Mama was still in a bad mood, he would make some jokes and would tease Mama so she would smile and when Mama gave in into Papa’s teasing and started laughing, that was a sign that she’s no longer crabby. Eventually, our house would be filled with teasing and laughter and love. I really missed those moments with Papa. Imagine, with 7 children, I think it couldn’t really be helped that Mama would be exasperated at us sometimes with all our bantering, arguments and fights. She really had a handful. I am proud because they were able to give us fair attention and love and they were able to raise us well.
In my own family, I and my husband have a fair share in disciplining our children. We believe that children need chastisement sometimes for them to realize what they have done wrong. We make it a point that they understood why they have to be spanked. They understand that we are doing it because we love them and we want them to be corrected for their wrongdoings, misbehavior, and disobedience. It is difficult to see our children get hurt but we have to be strong and be intentional. After that, we would talk to our children and affirm them of our love. I do not want them to harbor any ill-feeling towards us so we always try to be open-minded and just in validating their reasons and enforcing disciplinary actions.
As I dig more information, perspective, and principles in parenting, I perceived a more comprehensive one – the bible. It has instructions and principles on how to teach and discipline our children. Our church has been studying a series in the old testament and just recently, we tackled the “Ten Commandments of God” and some of the messages in the worship service were about parenting. I have learned for one, “Children have to honor their parents but parents should know how to honor their children as well. We should show them that we are honorable parents.” – from our sister’s testimony. We should pray for our children for every aspect of their lives. This is powerful enough to make their paths straight with the Lord. I gained a lot of biblical insights through hearing/listening people’s testimony and reading the bible. I’m glad that I will not be lacking guidance to improve as a parent because I’ve come to distinguish the one true and effective way, approach and principles through the Word of God. And I hope that I may be able to utilize my knowledge in accordance to God’s grace and blessing for my children to become God-fearing individuals. Not only for them but for our family to be Christ-centered.